The twin boys were looking at the peacock on the roof.
"Spread your tail feathers then." said the first boy
"Go on, Go on, Go on, Go on." said the second boy
"Mum why won't he spread his tail feathers?" said the first boy
"Because he has two females on the roof with him, and he feels he does not need to bother. He is spoilt for choice. But if you made out that there was another male peacock in the vacinity then he might get worried and make a show. Males behave stupidly when there is competition about."
"How do we make the sound of a peacock?" said the second boy
"Just make a sound like a 2x4 going through a circular saw." said the mother.
"Like this "KKreeeccccccKKKKK?" said the first boy, smiling at his brother
"Yeah that should get him worried." said the mother, proud of her son
"KKreeeccccccKKKKK" said the second boy, immitating his brother
"Not so loud" said the mother, wondering what the passersby thought
"KKreeeccccccKKKKK" said the first boy, his eyes popping for effect.
"People are looking" said the mother, getting agitated
"KKreeeccccccKKKKK" said the second boy, flapping his arms like wings.
"Stop it now your drawing attention to yourselves" said the mother. trying to grab hold of them.
"KKreeeccccccKKKKK" said the first boy, ignoring the peacock and screaming in his brothers face.
"That's enough." said the mother, swinging her shopping bag at the boys
"KKreeeccccccKKKKK" said the second boy, nose to nose with his brother and the spit flying.
"Just wait to you get home" said the mother, aiming a drop goal kick at their backsides.
"KKreeeccccccKKKKK" said the first boy, grabing his brother around the neck and getting him in a headlock.
"Your dad is going to hear about this" said the mother, chasing after them through the bushes.
"KKreeeccccccKKKKK" said the second boy, tripping up his brother
"No more pocket money for you" said the mother. grabbing them both by the scruff of the neck
"KKreeeccccccKKKKK" said the first boy, flailing his arms about wildly in an attempt to escape.
"Will you stop that!!! No more sweets for a week!!!" said the mother., shouting after the boys as they sped off down the road together.
"KKreeeccccccKKKKK " said the boys in unison.
Sunday, April 24, 2005
Clivia flowers again
We got this plant last year at our house warming party. It bloomed for quite a while and then lay dormant over the winter, and was left to "suffer". Just left in a cool dry place, and over the winter months it did nothing.
Only in February did we begin watering again and and adding some fertiliser. A few green shoots began to sprout from the centre, and then some sort of buds that did not look promising at all.
Slowly however a stalk began to form and now we have been rewarded by a new set of glorious orange flowers.
Everything has its season.
Only in February did we begin watering again and and adding some fertiliser. A few green shoots began to sprout from the centre, and then some sort of buds that did not look promising at all.
Slowly however a stalk began to form and now we have been rewarded by a new set of glorious orange flowers.
Everything has its season.
Monday, April 18, 2005
Ukulele Orchestra of Great Britain
Went to the Ukulele Orchestra of Great Britain's Concert in Espoo tonight. There are two more nights Friday 15th and Saturday 16th and if you are a fan of dry British humour then it is a treat. Tonights performance was sold out, and if you decide to go here is a tip get in the queue early are get right down the front and sit at the tables on the dance floor instead of the seats in the theatre.
I happened to sit down the front near Dave the long haired one and he selected our table to give presents to. I received a two day old copy of the Guardian, and the man who was sitting next to me go a used ferry-boat sticker, while his two children were given a used British rail ticket and a used stamp. As you can well imagine no expense is spared on this tour.
What can you expect? Well music from that great classical composer Johan Sebastian Hendrix. They also do modern composers like Stockhausen in a Johnny Cash style. Kiss by Prince gets a going over, and well as a cossack interpretation of Leaning on a lampost, the George Formby classic which now becomes Lenin on a lampost. The ying-tong song by Spike Milligan gets a good thrashing as does the Robert Johnson song "Hot tamales and their red hot". Songs by Marylin Monroe get featured twice, and there is a very moving performance of a Tom Waits tune.
The featured instrumentals include the theme from "the good the bad and the ugly," and that bit of music everybody knows from silent movies when the hero has to made haste to rescue the heroine who is tied to the railway tracks. At one point they had 5 people playing the one small ukulele at the same time, as a novelty. They also did a rendition of Finlandia, which brought the house down.
The concert lasts 2 hours. Drinks are served at a bar, as well as coffee and cakes. At the interval they sell their latest CD which they will autograph, although George did comment that he believed they would be more valuable if they remained unsigned.
Picture taking with flash was forbidden doing the performance, but nobody seemed to mind if I popped off a few shots when they were accepting applause.
I happened to sit down the front near Dave the long haired one and he selected our table to give presents to. I received a two day old copy of the Guardian, and the man who was sitting next to me go a used ferry-boat sticker, while his two children were given a used British rail ticket and a used stamp. As you can well imagine no expense is spared on this tour.
What can you expect? Well music from that great classical composer Johan Sebastian Hendrix. They also do modern composers like Stockhausen in a Johnny Cash style. Kiss by Prince gets a going over, and well as a cossack interpretation of Leaning on a lampost, the George Formby classic which now becomes Lenin on a lampost. The ying-tong song by Spike Milligan gets a good thrashing as does the Robert Johnson song "Hot tamales and their red hot". Songs by Marylin Monroe get featured twice, and there is a very moving performance of a Tom Waits tune.
The featured instrumentals include the theme from "the good the bad and the ugly," and that bit of music everybody knows from silent movies when the hero has to made haste to rescue the heroine who is tied to the railway tracks. At one point they had 5 people playing the one small ukulele at the same time, as a novelty. They also did a rendition of Finlandia, which brought the house down.
The concert lasts 2 hours. Drinks are served at a bar, as well as coffee and cakes. At the interval they sell their latest CD which they will autograph, although George did comment that he believed they would be more valuable if they remained unsigned.
Picture taking with flash was forbidden doing the performance, but nobody seemed to mind if I popped off a few shots when they were accepting applause.
Guitar solos are from the dark side
You see ukuleles are the only real stringed instrument that humans should be allowed to play. Anything bigger and with more strings comes from the "dark side", that is what George said. Guitars are mutant ukuleles. Genetic abberations. And we all know what we get with guitars... guitar solos.
George warned us that the man next to Dave. His ukulele was just on the border line and that the force from the dark side might be such that we might be subjected to something like a guitar solo, and if it happened then we were under no circumstances to give him any encouragement.
Well sure enought the dark side of the force took over and the fellow with the big ukulele went into a mega thrash of the Byrds "eight miles high" and the other ukulele players were aghast and stoped playing... that is all except Dave with the long hair who was drawn in by the dark side and joined in a solo duel with the fellow with the big ukulele.
One by one the other band members left the stage in disgust, shaking their heads in dismay, and Dave and Rodney (yes that might have been his name) exchanged blistering solos reminiscent of the master of darkness his Highness Hendrix.
Then slowly they emerged from the euphoric guitar solo induced rapture to discover that the stage was abandoned save for themselves, They glanced furtively at each other, and began to squirm in their seats with embarrassment. In public they had had committed the ultimate sin aof any ukulele player and gone over the the dark side by playing guitar solos in public.
And so it proved to be an appropriate momment to have an intermission.
George warned us that the man next to Dave. His ukulele was just on the border line and that the force from the dark side might be such that we might be subjected to something like a guitar solo, and if it happened then we were under no circumstances to give him any encouragement.
Well sure enought the dark side of the force took over and the fellow with the big ukulele went into a mega thrash of the Byrds "eight miles high" and the other ukulele players were aghast and stoped playing... that is all except Dave with the long hair who was drawn in by the dark side and joined in a solo duel with the fellow with the big ukulele.
One by one the other band members left the stage in disgust, shaking their heads in dismay, and Dave and Rodney (yes that might have been his name) exchanged blistering solos reminiscent of the master of darkness his Highness Hendrix.
Then slowly they emerged from the euphoric guitar solo induced rapture to discover that the stage was abandoned save for themselves, They glanced furtively at each other, and began to squirm in their seats with embarrassment. In public they had had committed the ultimate sin aof any ukulele player and gone over the the dark side by playing guitar solos in public.
And so it proved to be an appropriate momment to have an intermission.
Tuesday, April 12, 2005
World turned upside down

Deathmetal rockers - dressed in pink
Politicians who sit down - and think
Catwalk models who - eat what they want
Schoolyard bullies who - refuse to taunt
Soldiers who - refuse to shoot
Burglars who - give back their loot
Multinationals that always - go bust
Lawyers that you can - really trust
Food bred for taste - not for shape
Mr. Incredible - wearing a cape
Communists with the - cross of Christ
Cats who love to - play with mice
Christians with the - crescent moon and star
A Tee-totalers office - in a downtown bar
Cooperation and willingness - from a mule
Wisdom and insight - from a fool
No more fear - from the pentagram
Muslims and Jews - eating ham
Chairman Moa hat - on a conservative head
Riches for the poor - and the hungry fed
Only laughter and no tears - from the clown
Heaven on earth - the world turned upside down.
Tuesday, April 05, 2005
New life (Resurrection)

Then Lemminkäinen's mother
took them into her mouth
she tested them with her tongue
tasted them to her liking:
"These are some of those ointments
the Almighty's remedies
with which God has anointed
the Lord poured on injuries."
Then she anointed the weary one
tended the ill-befallen
anointed through the gaps in bone
and through the cracks in limbs
anointed below and above
slapped the middle once.
Then she put this into words
she declared and chattered.
"Rise up out of sleep
get up out of dream
from these evil places
from the bed of hard luck!"
Kalevela (Resurrection)
Lemminkäinen's mother heals her son.
Monday, April 04, 2005
Arise with healing in his wings
The pope died at Easter. The easter message has been about death, suffering, and most important of all ressurection.
So over the weekend in Rome, thousands of people were praying for the pope, and I expect most of them are feeling some dispair or sadness. So what would be the last word the pope would have for the masses of people waiting for a final message from him? It is the measure of the man that he did not focus on himself, but instead directed us towards song and rejoicing.
I picked something up on Flickr from someone who has been struggling with depression. I felt the words were full of hope, and this person by uttering them was bringing hope to himself and others. Words are like that once they are spoken or written they can become a blessing. So I am writing them down here as a blessing.
"Do not abandon yourselves to despair. We are the Easter people, and hallelujah is our song." - Pope Giovanni Paolo II (Karol Jozef Wojtyla)
The photo itself is very symbolic since in the old testament a white dove features in the story of Noah, in that it returned with the olive branch to the ark, and this has become a modern symbol of peace. While in the new testament the dove has been the symbol of God's Holy Sprit which decended like a dove when Christ was baptised in the Jordan river.
In this photo the dove seems to have another meaning, and Karol Jozef Wojtyla is watching his own spirit soar away to a better place where every tear will be wiped from our eyes and there will be no more suffering.
So over the weekend in Rome, thousands of people were praying for the pope, and I expect most of them are feeling some dispair or sadness. So what would be the last word the pope would have for the masses of people waiting for a final message from him? It is the measure of the man that he did not focus on himself, but instead directed us towards song and rejoicing.
I picked something up on Flickr from someone who has been struggling with depression. I felt the words were full of hope, and this person by uttering them was bringing hope to himself and others. Words are like that once they are spoken or written they can become a blessing. So I am writing them down here as a blessing.
"Do not abandon yourselves to despair. We are the Easter people, and hallelujah is our song." - Pope Giovanni Paolo II (Karol Jozef Wojtyla)
The photo itself is very symbolic since in the old testament a white dove features in the story of Noah, in that it returned with the olive branch to the ark, and this has become a modern symbol of peace. While in the new testament the dove has been the symbol of God's Holy Sprit which decended like a dove when Christ was baptised in the Jordan river.
In this photo the dove seems to have another meaning, and Karol Jozef Wojtyla is watching his own spirit soar away to a better place where every tear will be wiped from our eyes and there will be no more suffering.
My kids in 1986 (smiling)
Laughter is a good thing. Smiling is good, even a snigger is permissable. A discrete titter behind your hand is OK, but there are times in life when you need to blow coffee out your nose in an explosion of laughter.
You get giggles from tickling but that is sort of cheating. A belly laugh that comes rumbling out of the depths of you is good for your soul, but the best laughs are the ones you do in unison, with other people... lets call it orchestrated laughter. No that gives the idea that it is organised and structued in some way. The laughter that has refreshed me the most is more like free form jazz, the noises of laughter are all improvised.
These times do not happen very often but they are characterised by abandonment and helplessness. Birds in Spring sing their heart out. There is joy in the sound of their voices, the warbling and the whistling. Laughter is something like that. Non-verbal communication of happiness and hope.
These are the laughs that leave your breathless, gasping for air. What do you feel when you are swamped by your own laughter, and joy is ringing in your breast like a bell.
It is like listening to a scratchy recording from the 1930's and recognising the wonder and the beauty of it all and saying Oh Yeah!! Oh Yeah!! Oh man!!
You get giggles from tickling but that is sort of cheating. A belly laugh that comes rumbling out of the depths of you is good for your soul, but the best laughs are the ones you do in unison, with other people... lets call it orchestrated laughter. No that gives the idea that it is organised and structued in some way. The laughter that has refreshed me the most is more like free form jazz, the noises of laughter are all improvised.
These times do not happen very often but they are characterised by abandonment and helplessness. Birds in Spring sing their heart out. There is joy in the sound of their voices, the warbling and the whistling. Laughter is something like that. Non-verbal communication of happiness and hope.
These are the laughs that leave your breathless, gasping for air. What do you feel when you are swamped by your own laughter, and joy is ringing in your breast like a bell.
It is like listening to a scratchy recording from the 1930's and recognising the wonder and the beauty of it all and saying Oh Yeah!! Oh Yeah!! Oh man!!
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
Choirboys vs The Camel that wept

For our wedding anniversary we went to BioCity and watched a french movie called the choirboys. It was the story of a terrible boarding school, with children that were out of control. They have a fat pudgy bald teacher who gets them interested in singing, and so begins their road to salvation, as they escape from the brutality of their prison like surroundings into the freedom and beauty of music. The headmaster is a sadistic monster. The janitor is abused and worked like a slave. The gym master tries to keep everything under control by twisting ears. The music teacher is kind hearted and although he has succes in teaching the kids to sing he is fired from his job.
The singing is spine chilling and has a countess clutching a handkerchief to her bosom and looking dewy eyed at the choirboys with angelic voices. There is no happy end and no John Wayne salutes. The fat bald music teachers does not get the girl and he gets fired for all his troubles. The soprano boy in the choir does become famous and he owes it all to the fat bald music teacher.

The other movie we thought about going to see was "The camel that wept" which was made in Mongolia. I just did not see the potential for any drama coming from a movie about weeping camels. We did see the trailer and I was halfway disappointed that we had not gone to see a story about a young camel being deserted by its mother. I think I might have been put off by the thought that it might have been a Disney type "Incredible Journey" with camels talking to each other in Bronx accents, but apparently not. Camels are big in mongolia so why shouldn't they star in their own movies?
The Camel that wept review supplied by crfullmoon on flickr
Tuesday, March 29, 2005
On the ice

Went to the lake with Jasper and borrowed papa's ice drill it was blunt as hell, and although we bored for 15 minutes we could not get threw the ice. It must be over 50 cm thick.
I remember a story told to me about a couple of Finns who went out drunk at night to fish. There was a field just next to the lake and they had no idea if they had been drilling down to the earth or down to the water, and being drunk they did not care.
The next morning they went out to inspect the holes they had bored only to discover they had been fishing on a field. No wonder they did not catch anything.
She who is to be obeyed asked us to cut down the reeds, and I sythed down a vast expanse of reeds along the lake shore. I thought while I was doing it these reeds are dead and new ones will be coming up when the ice melts, so cutting down these deadhead won't make a blind bit of difference, but it pleased she who must be obeyed and made her happy, so that was the main thing.
"Shall I beat with might and main
lay it on as a man can
or lay it as the tools allow
beat as much as is needed?"
"Kullervo Kalervo's son
battered then with might and main
laid it on as a man can
the water he stirred to gruel
beat the seine to tow
and the fish he mashed to scum"
Wasted energy is not new.
Thursday, March 24, 2005
Opening a present of celebration

Today I will drive with Maija and pick up our grandson Jasper and we will then go to Lahti to see Maija's mum. We have plans to go out to the lake and while the ice is still firm, cut down the reeds that are sticking through the ice. I may even bore a hole in the ice an do some fishing.
When I mentioned to Raisa that I had bought a pilkki fishing rod she raised the question of fishing permits. I said that I didn't need a permit since my rod was so short. She told the story to her friends at college who had laughed, and marveled at what a wit her father was.
I look out my window and the sky is a brilliant blue. The flags on Lippulaiva which I always look at to see how strong the wind is blowing are not moving at all. They are still, which means it will be a great day for slow walking in the snow and sun.
This morning to celebrate going to Lahti I opened up one of my unopened Christmas presents. It was from Christopher, "The Kalevala" the Finnish national epic poem.
"This I hoped for all my days
looked for all my growing-time
waited as for a good year
looked as for summer's coming
and now my wish has come true"
"Now some music would be good
and some merrymaking right
for this new state of affairs
apon these fair farms;"
"Steady old Väinämöinen
the everlasting singer
prepares his fingers
rubs his thumbs ready.
He sits on the rock of joy
on the song-boulder settles
on the silver hill
on the golden knoll
he fingered the instrument
turned the curved thing on his knees
the kantele in his hands
he uttered a word, spoke thus
Now let him come and listen
who may not before have heard
the joy of eternal bards
the sound of the kantele!"
I still have two presents unopened. I have a feeling I may have good reason to open them very soon. This is my hope.
Tuesday, March 15, 2005
Food from the blind

There are two resturants in Berlin that have blind waiters and you have to eat your food in the dark. One is called "Dunkelrestaurant Berlin" and the other one is called "Nocti Vagus"
There is also a cafe for the deaf, and an ultra-trendy establishment, run by a slightly crazy Argentinean, where you eat what you're given, they have no menu, then pay what you think the meal is worth.
For some reason I like this novel approch to eating. I have had my own experiance in Italy of eating in a resturant where you have to eat what the chef makes for you. It was in Trieste Italy and the owner was "Frank the Pig"
But how do I arrive at writing something about resturants for the blind. Well it all started off as an experiment getting CD's from the library. I decided to go in to the CD racks and pull out 7 CDs at random, I was acting as though I was blind. I did not look at the covers or the artists, I just blindly took them and checked them out.
Out of the 7 CDs there was one gem by a singer from the Faroe Islands. His name is Teitur, and he sings in english. His music is very poetic and lyrical, and I enjoyed the soft melodies very much... and so it was when I was finding out more about Teitur that I found out that he wanted information about these "blind resturants" in Berlin. So a strange little circle relating to blindness was completed. Going from the blind selection of CDs to the "blind resturants" in Belin.
In our lives we hate to fly blind. Everything has to be planned, and thought out well in advance. The calories in the food we eat are all calculated. The % fat in our milk. It is almost as if our well being is weighed out for us. Excess tips the balance in one direction. Frugality tips it in the opposite direction. We leave ourselves very little room to be surprised by goodness. We miss out on good music because we are not prepared in any way to pick up a CD by someone from the Faroe islands with a name like Teitur. We are not prepared to go blindly into a resturant, and on trust, eat what the chef prepares.
The principle of our lives is one of limitations, and by having that outlook we miss being kissed by the joy of the unexpected.
Saturday, March 12, 2005
Dancing fingers.

So I wanted to do a video for Noa on his birthday. A short capture from the Webcam, and the idea was to have dancing fingers. All dancing fingers should have black patent shoes so I painted my fingernails black. I stuffed a hanky up my sleave and let it hang down so that it looked like a skirt and then I made my fingers dance to the samba, and did some provocative high kicks so you could see that my fingers were not wearing any underwear.
The dancing was out of sync with the music and most of the steps were just a blur... what do you expect from a cheap webcam, but the most disapointing thing was that once it was made it was too large to send as an email attachment.
But that is not the end of the story. I didn't wash the ink off my nails and I became conscious of this fact while in the library at Iso Omena when I noticed a couple of gothgirls were sniggering at my black painted fingernails hovering over the mouse. I would have thought it was completely uncool for gothgirls to snigger. If you are pale and white and dressed in swaths of black lace then it does your image absolutely no good to snigger behind a lily white hand cupped over you mouth and nose.
Then at the supermarket checkout the cashier had a David Beckham diamond stud in his ear. I griped the pen to sign the receipt, and all of a sudden I wished I was ambidextrous. The cashier observing my black painted nails, sucked both of his cheeks in and pouted his lips. I gave him the benifit of the doubt and construed this to mean he was trying to control a snigger and not that he was flirting with me.
When I got home I took a picture of my painted nails and then scrubed the ink off my fingernails
Dancing fingers video
Friday, March 11, 2005
Singing the blues away.
When I was young I was always listening to the radio, waiting for the song and the words to be broadcast that would change my life. There was this expectancy that somebody somewhere will put words and music together that would transform me into something better. It has never happened, but I am still waiting, still eager for it to happen.
I ask myself can music influence things in the world, can it affect change in peoples lives. Did John Lennon's "Give peace a chance" stop the war in Viet Nam? Would the war have draged on longer if he had never written that song?
Or what of the "Singing Revolution" in Estonia when over one quarter of a million people meet in the open air to sing songs like "Koit" (Dawn Is Breakin' Through), Laulu Mõju [the Influence of a Song], Laul Põhjamaast [Hymn of the Nordic Lands] Nukurava Nukulaul [the Puppet People's Puppet Song [from the Song Cycl].
Previously in Hungary and Checkoslovakia, any attempt to become independant were brutally crushed by soviet tanks, but in 1988 the Estonians sang their way to freedom.
In the Song Fields of Tallin, night after night, thousands of people turned up to sing in the open air. The singing turned into a political rally, ending with over 300,000 Estonians voicing their demand for self-government through song. The Estonians say "We sang ourselves free."
A good song is no more than the expression of a truth that we hold deep in our hearts. The utterance of the words, the voice releasing the melody, gives birth to hope, and new life.
I ask myself can music influence things in the world, can it affect change in peoples lives. Did John Lennon's "Give peace a chance" stop the war in Viet Nam? Would the war have draged on longer if he had never written that song?
Or what of the "Singing Revolution" in Estonia when over one quarter of a million people meet in the open air to sing songs like "Koit" (Dawn Is Breakin' Through), Laulu Mõju [the Influence of a Song], Laul Põhjamaast [Hymn of the Nordic Lands] Nukurava Nukulaul [the Puppet People's Puppet Song [from the Song Cycl].
Previously in Hungary and Checkoslovakia, any attempt to become independant were brutally crushed by soviet tanks, but in 1988 the Estonians sang their way to freedom.
In the Song Fields of Tallin, night after night, thousands of people turned up to sing in the open air. The singing turned into a political rally, ending with over 300,000 Estonians voicing their demand for self-government through song. The Estonians say "We sang ourselves free."
A good song is no more than the expression of a truth that we hold deep in our hearts. The utterance of the words, the voice releasing the melody, gives birth to hope, and new life.
Puddock in a pool.
I was thinking about my father today, and more especially his love for poetry. Having been brought up in a house with no TV the main passtime was reading, and at a young age I got a fair bit of exposure to the poems of Robert Burns.
My father went for the poems that looked at social inequalities, hypocricy, conflict between church and state, the freedoms of the individual. Who would have thought Burns could sum up the problems of old age in a couple of lines
"But see him on the edge of life
with cares and sorrows torn.
Then age and want that ill matched pair
prove man was made to mourn."
When he was struck down with dementia, when he he could not remember the day of the week, and he had difficulty remembering what had been said to him a few minutes before, he would often perform these amazing feats of recitation and faultlessly recite a poem he had learnt as a boy. Perhaps he would do it to reassure himself that his memory was still functioning properly.
But the one poem that brought a twinkle to his eye and made him laugh was a very short one. I don't know who wrote it, perhaps he made it up himself.
"When Rob is in a rage,
He's like a lion in a cage.
But when his rage begins to cool,
He's like a puddock in a pool."
My father went for the poems that looked at social inequalities, hypocricy, conflict between church and state, the freedoms of the individual. Who would have thought Burns could sum up the problems of old age in a couple of lines
"But see him on the edge of life
with cares and sorrows torn.
Then age and want that ill matched pair
prove man was made to mourn."
When he was struck down with dementia, when he he could not remember the day of the week, and he had difficulty remembering what had been said to him a few minutes before, he would often perform these amazing feats of recitation and faultlessly recite a poem he had learnt as a boy. Perhaps he would do it to reassure himself that his memory was still functioning properly.
But the one poem that brought a twinkle to his eye and made him laugh was a very short one. I don't know who wrote it, perhaps he made it up himself.
"When Rob is in a rage,
He's like a lion in a cage.
But when his rage begins to cool,
He's like a puddock in a pool."
Wednesday, March 09, 2005
Roope and Maija listen out for scrumjax
If Scrumjax is anything like Slack then I want you to cut me some. We all need some slack in our lives, especially when things get too tight. Some people don't have any slack and they are screwed up fit to burst.
I want slack in my trousers. I want slack in my bank account. When I am eating I want my food spiced with slack, and when I am out walking I want to do it is a slack way.
I am more that willing to give my children all the slack they want. You just can't have too much slack. It comes in handy to give away as presents. Having plenty of slack at a birthday party helps things to run smoothly.
So cut me some slack Jack!!!
I want slack in my trousers. I want slack in my bank account. When I am eating I want my food spiced with slack, and when I am out walking I want to do it is a slack way.
I am more that willing to give my children all the slack they want. You just can't have too much slack. It comes in handy to give away as presents. Having plenty of slack at a birthday party helps things to run smoothly.
So cut me some slack Jack!!!
Tuesday, March 08, 2005
Shaggy dog story #2
We did have a dog once. It was a âfoster-dogâ. That should have set the ALARM BELLS RINGING.
She was a BITCH⦠a fast black BITCH.
She was officially known as a Lapland reindeer dog, and from the way her eyes popped out of her head, and her tongue hung out the side of her mouth you would think sheâd eaten A KILO OF COCAINE FOR BREAKFAST.
This dog was CRAZY with a capital âKâ
She wanted to RULE EVERYTHING, and I do mean EVERYTHING.
Dogs, cats, kids, birds, ANYTHING THAT MOVED
Take her to the enclosed dog park and in a second she would have rounded up all the other dogs and put them in A CORNER.
If another dog did not cooperate she would jump on their backs and KNOCK THEM to THE GROUND.
Great Danes, Alsatians, dogs twice her size had to OBEY.
She was a PSYCHO. She needed to have everything UNDER CONTROL.
She would have herded stones IF THEY HAD MOVED.
She had to have something to herd. If she had penned all of the dogs she would start on any LOOSE KIDS RUNNING AROUND.
If she had worn stockings she would have had their GUTS FOR GARTERS.
If she had played golf she would have had their GONNADS FOR GOLFBALLS.
She had ATTITUDE, and would not be messed with.
Tricks? Yeah she could do tricks especially at the DINNER TABLE.
For Ilona that bitch would SHAKE HER HEAD to get something to eat,
For Patrik she would YAWN,
for Riina she would ROLL OVER,
for Raisa she would do a FORELEG STRETCH
When we had visitor around that bitch would get in front of them and do infinite combinations of the ROLL OVER, YAWN, FORELEG STRETCH, HEAD SHAKE
What is WRONG with that BITCH they would say.
Weâd say SHEâS PSYCHO.
Letâs just say me and the wife were sitting down for a meal. A Friday night together without the kids, and a nice roast chicken on the table. The door bell rings. I get up to answer it. It is somebody for Maija. I call her to the door. While at the door we hear a clatter of plates falling from the table and that BITCH is standing on top of the table with HALF A CHICKEN in her mouth and a look of dumb bemusement on her face as if to say âWHAT?â
Run? That bitch could run ALL DAY and never get tired.
It was EXHAUSTING JUST WATCHING HER GO.
Took her to the forest once, she was all the time straining at the LEASH TO BE FREE.
Released her and she shot off like a FLASH OF BLACK LIGHTENING
Called for her to come. She came within 3 metres and smiled. That look on her face said YOU SHOULD NEVER HAVE LET ME OFF HE LEASH.
For THREE HOURS SHE TEASED ME. I hate being made a fool of by a BITCH.
Every time I tried to catch her she was off like a BLACK BLUR ON THE CANVAS OF FORREST FLOOR.
So humiliating. I had no luck in catching her. If I had fallen into a BARREL OF TITS I WOULD COME UP SUCKING MY THUMB. My luck was that bad.
Sex!!! That was her downfall. Another man with a dog on a leash stopped to observe THE MAN AND HIS DOG COMEDY SHOW.
And when dogs get together they like to do a bit of BUTT-SMOOCHING.
That gave me the opportunity to grab her and put her on the leash, but the look in her eye to the other dog said TAKE ME IâM YOURS, that three hour run in the forest WAS ONLY A WARM UP.
We donât have a dog now and if I do take a picture of a dog it is a DUMB DOG.
A dog that is wearing a HAT
Dogs that wear hats canât be ASS-SMOKING SMART to let themselves get rigged up like that, so you are safe to take their pictures, but I always keep a wary eye on my back in case a BLACK BITCH STREEKS from nowhere, jumps on my back and HERDS ME INTO A CORNER.
She was a BITCH⦠a fast black BITCH.
She was officially known as a Lapland reindeer dog, and from the way her eyes popped out of her head, and her tongue hung out the side of her mouth you would think sheâd eaten A KILO OF COCAINE FOR BREAKFAST.
This dog was CRAZY with a capital âKâ
She wanted to RULE EVERYTHING, and I do mean EVERYTHING.
Dogs, cats, kids, birds, ANYTHING THAT MOVED
Take her to the enclosed dog park and in a second she would have rounded up all the other dogs and put them in A CORNER.
If another dog did not cooperate she would jump on their backs and KNOCK THEM to THE GROUND.
Great Danes, Alsatians, dogs twice her size had to OBEY.
She was a PSYCHO. She needed to have everything UNDER CONTROL.
She would have herded stones IF THEY HAD MOVED.
She had to have something to herd. If she had penned all of the dogs she would start on any LOOSE KIDS RUNNING AROUND.
If she had worn stockings she would have had their GUTS FOR GARTERS.
If she had played golf she would have had their GONNADS FOR GOLFBALLS.
She had ATTITUDE, and would not be messed with.
Tricks? Yeah she could do tricks especially at the DINNER TABLE.
For Ilona that bitch would SHAKE HER HEAD to get something to eat,
For Patrik she would YAWN,
for Riina she would ROLL OVER,
for Raisa she would do a FORELEG STRETCH
When we had visitor around that bitch would get in front of them and do infinite combinations of the ROLL OVER, YAWN, FORELEG STRETCH, HEAD SHAKE
What is WRONG with that BITCH they would say.
Weâd say SHEâS PSYCHO.
Letâs just say me and the wife were sitting down for a meal. A Friday night together without the kids, and a nice roast chicken on the table. The door bell rings. I get up to answer it. It is somebody for Maija. I call her to the door. While at the door we hear a clatter of plates falling from the table and that BITCH is standing on top of the table with HALF A CHICKEN in her mouth and a look of dumb bemusement on her face as if to say âWHAT?â
Run? That bitch could run ALL DAY and never get tired.
It was EXHAUSTING JUST WATCHING HER GO.
Took her to the forest once, she was all the time straining at the LEASH TO BE FREE.
Released her and she shot off like a FLASH OF BLACK LIGHTENING
Called for her to come. She came within 3 metres and smiled. That look on her face said YOU SHOULD NEVER HAVE LET ME OFF HE LEASH.
For THREE HOURS SHE TEASED ME. I hate being made a fool of by a BITCH.
Every time I tried to catch her she was off like a BLACK BLUR ON THE CANVAS OF FORREST FLOOR.
So humiliating. I had no luck in catching her. If I had fallen into a BARREL OF TITS I WOULD COME UP SUCKING MY THUMB. My luck was that bad.
Sex!!! That was her downfall. Another man with a dog on a leash stopped to observe THE MAN AND HIS DOG COMEDY SHOW.
And when dogs get together they like to do a bit of BUTT-SMOOCHING.
That gave me the opportunity to grab her and put her on the leash, but the look in her eye to the other dog said TAKE ME IâM YOURS, that three hour run in the forest WAS ONLY A WARM UP.
We donât have a dog now and if I do take a picture of a dog it is a DUMB DOG.
A dog that is wearing a HAT
Dogs that wear hats canât be ASS-SMOKING SMART to let themselves get rigged up like that, so you are safe to take their pictures, but I always keep a wary eye on my back in case a BLACK BITCH STREEKS from nowhere, jumps on my back and HERDS ME INTO A CORNER.
Monday, March 07, 2005
efatima:colour and detail
efatima from the UAE was a very active photographer on Flickr. Over the weekend her account was deleted, and all of her beautiful photos disappeared.
Now if you wanted to recall what she has done it is impossible. I had a few of her photos maked as favourites but even the thumnails have gone. On her blog site all the places that used to have images are now gaping holes. Only her words remain, and I thought I would save at least something she had written before her words might disappear as well. Her photos were very vibrant with lots of colour saturation and she was very interested in minute details, so the text I chose was about her vision of a small world.
If the earth were only a few feet in diameter, floating a few feet above a field somewhere, people would come from everywhere to marvel at it. They would walk around it, marveling at its big pools of water, its little pools and the water flowing between them, the bumps on it, the holes in it, the very thin layer of gas surrounding it, the water suspended in the gas, all the creatures walking around the surface of the ball, and at the creatures in the water. People would declare it precious because it was the only one, and they would protect it so that it would not be hurt. The ball would be the greatest wonder known, and they would come to behold it, to be healed, to gain knowledge, to know beauty and to wonder how it could be. People would love it, and defend it with their lives, because they would somehow know that their lives, their own roundness, could be nothing without it. If the Earth were only a few feet in diameter.
-efatima (Sunday, November 17, 2002 blog)
Now if you wanted to recall what she has done it is impossible. I had a few of her photos maked as favourites but even the thumnails have gone. On her blog site all the places that used to have images are now gaping holes. Only her words remain, and I thought I would save at least something she had written before her words might disappear as well. Her photos were very vibrant with lots of colour saturation and she was very interested in minute details, so the text I chose was about her vision of a small world.
If the earth were only a few feet in diameter, floating a few feet above a field somewhere, people would come from everywhere to marvel at it. They would walk around it, marveling at its big pools of water, its little pools and the water flowing between them, the bumps on it, the holes in it, the very thin layer of gas surrounding it, the water suspended in the gas, all the creatures walking around the surface of the ball, and at the creatures in the water. People would declare it precious because it was the only one, and they would protect it so that it would not be hurt. The ball would be the greatest wonder known, and they would come to behold it, to be healed, to gain knowledge, to know beauty and to wonder how it could be. People would love it, and defend it with their lives, because they would somehow know that their lives, their own roundness, could be nothing without it. If the Earth were only a few feet in diameter.
-efatima (Sunday, November 17, 2002 blog)
Black dog with blue boat
Trawler frozen in the ice at Espoonlahti, with man walking a black dog on the frozen sea.
Painting Box
by Mike heron
When the morning of your eyes comes waking through my shadows
Leaving just a trace of twilight sleep,
I whisper to the baby raindrops playing on my window,
And tell them gently this is not the time that they should weep.
For somewhere in my mind there is a painting box,
I have every color there it's true.
Just lately when I look inside my painting box,
I seem to pick the colors of you.
The purple sail above me catches all the strength of summer.
Fishes stop and ask me where I am bound.
I smile and shake my head and say my little ship is sinking,
But I kind of like the sea that I'm on, and I don't mind if I do drown.
For somewhere in my mind there is a painting box,
I have every color there it's true.
Just lately when I look inside my painting box,
I seem to pick the colors of you.
Painting Box
by Mike heron
When the morning of your eyes comes waking through my shadows
Leaving just a trace of twilight sleep,
I whisper to the baby raindrops playing on my window,
And tell them gently this is not the time that they should weep.
For somewhere in my mind there is a painting box,
I have every color there it's true.
Just lately when I look inside my painting box,
I seem to pick the colors of you.
The purple sail above me catches all the strength of summer.
Fishes stop and ask me where I am bound.
I smile and shake my head and say my little ship is sinking,
But I kind of like the sea that I'm on, and I don't mind if I do drown.
For somewhere in my mind there is a painting box,
I have every color there it's true.
Just lately when I look inside my painting box,
I seem to pick the colors of you.
Old Boy (did you see what I just did there)
Walking on the frozen sea at Espoonlahti is something I enjoy. I has got something to do with the vast expanse of snow, and the equally vast sky that is blindingly blue.
The other thing that makes it so good is the air. It is better than a meal, or at least when you have done a five kilometer walk and breathed all that fresh air a meal tastes so much better.
What do you see when you are out walking on the sea? Well lots of other people doing the same thing. Families out for walks, kids being pulled behind on a sledge. Old couples walking slowly over the ice, Young couples skiing fast in the skating style, middle aged couples skiing in the traditional nordic style. And then the ice is pock-marked with 15 cm holes where the ice fishers have been.
My own plan is to walk quite near the shoreline and look for a hot spot. This is a place that is sheltered from the wind, and for some magical reason is miraculously warmer than out on the open sea.
The hot spot always seems to have a huge granite stone you can lean on, or an upturned boat with a black pitch bottom that absorbs the suns rays. It is a pleasure to sit in a hot spot and watch the movement of people out on the ice. They often look like matchstick people from a L.S. Lowry painting. A hot spot is at its best when someone fires up a sauna on the shoreline and the blue smoke smell of resinous spruce permeates the air.
The sun makes young people move fast, and it makes old people sit down.
The other thing that makes it so good is the air. It is better than a meal, or at least when you have done a five kilometer walk and breathed all that fresh air a meal tastes so much better.
What do you see when you are out walking on the sea? Well lots of other people doing the same thing. Families out for walks, kids being pulled behind on a sledge. Old couples walking slowly over the ice, Young couples skiing fast in the skating style, middle aged couples skiing in the traditional nordic style. And then the ice is pock-marked with 15 cm holes where the ice fishers have been.
My own plan is to walk quite near the shoreline and look for a hot spot. This is a place that is sheltered from the wind, and for some magical reason is miraculously warmer than out on the open sea.
The hot spot always seems to have a huge granite stone you can lean on, or an upturned boat with a black pitch bottom that absorbs the suns rays. It is a pleasure to sit in a hot spot and watch the movement of people out on the ice. They often look like matchstick people from a L.S. Lowry painting. A hot spot is at its best when someone fires up a sauna on the shoreline and the blue smoke smell of resinous spruce permeates the air.
The sun makes young people move fast, and it makes old people sit down.
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